Okay Thanksgiving Hosts and Hostesses. The countdown has started and Thanksgiving is just around the corner. There have been phone calls, texts and emails to decide at whose house is this year’s gathering place and what will be on the menu. Some families are extremely traditional and turkey with all of the dressings and trimmings will be in order. Others will take a “new wave” approach and will go out to restaurants to keep from having to cook themselves or be subjected to the meal by the relative who just did not pick up Grandma’s cooking skills.

If your family is anything like mine, the same small group of people host every year and relatives will show up empty handed with huge appetites and an opinion about everything that has been prepared. It’s the time of year that you open your home to family and friends, because it is “tradition.” You must be hospitable and smile and half-heartedly laugh at jokes by relatives that are not funny, because you are being gracious. Family members invite and bring their friends to join in on the festivities that they did not warn you about ahead of time, but you smile and make do.

This is the time your favorite relative is coming from out of town and you plan on having a ball, because you have not seen each other since last Thanksgiving. You are able to catch up and share secrets you have held close all year long. In your eyes, the rest of the family is plum crazy but this one cousin, sister, brother, aunt or uncle knows and understands you completely. When you give the “eye” to them across the table when Uncle Richard’s prayer is just a little too long and after the 10th “Father-God,” when he is a good five minutes into the prayer, you snicker and feel like you are going to pass out from sheer starvation! 

The men gather in front of the television and talk trash about the football game, and the women are busy chatting and cleaning up after the big meal. In the midst of all of this “family bonding,” the majority of the family is on their best behavior, except for that one relative who is always in their feelings for one reason or another and walks in with a dark cloud hovering over them. You never know what they will say or do, because they have been known to act a fool and embarrass themselves at every gathering by saying something hurtful or doing something stupid that they end up apologizing for later on. 

Then there’s the cousin, sister, brother, aunt or uncle who brought their new flame to meet the family and the flame either fits in and you love them instantly, or they are a weirdo and you pull the relative to the side and ask them where they picked up the flake. Let us not forget about the relative who has a different guy or girl at every family gathering and you just cannot keep up with who is who, so you are extra careful not to call them by the wrong name to keep your cousin out of trouble.

Some family members will be indulging in libations and spirits, but you know to hide the extra alcohol from the alcoholics in the family, because they tend to get a little rowdy and Aunt June broke Nanna’s chair last year. You hide the prescription drugs, because there’s always that one relative who constantly complains about her head or something else hurting, because she simply cannot cope without something in her system and she will take almost anything to remain in her constant state of numbness. The family has discussed having “interventions” several times, but she refuses to admit that she has a drug problem and slurs, “I ain’t no drug addict. These are ‘prescription drugs’ from the doctor.” You then look at everyone in the room and excuse yourself, because you hear Shirley and Ricco arguing about him staring at the new flame cousin Carlos brought with him this year.

And lastly let us not forget the relatives who bring their children to your home (which is not child-proof) who have no home training and when you say something about them wrecking your house, their mother or father looks at you sideways and you are ready to tell then to gather Little Johnny, Little Kayla and that pie they brought and get to stepping. But you do not do any of that, because it is Thanksgiving and it is supposed to be a time for love and acceptance, forgiving and tolerance. 

You smile as you count down the days, hours and minutes until everyone leaves and you can regroup, get your house back in order and take a deep breathe. All in all, no one’s family is perfect and there are plenty of family shenanigans going on across the country, so do not feel bad or ashamed. Embrace the fact that you are not alone in this world and that regardless of how crazy your family may seem, you have a clan of people who love you with all of your gifts and flaws, for they are flawed too. Squeeze them tight and wish them well until next year. Pray for their safety and well-being until you see them again. No one makes it in this world alone, so thank God for each and every one of them, because you cannot change them. Your job is to just love them unconditionally. 

Now go and gear up for the shenanigans and be gracious and courteous. 

Peace & blessings to all.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!